Saturday, 6 October 2012

Learn from change, because life is short

Christmas in my house is always about family. The tradition is to go to my grandparents and have the whole family round for a full Christmas dinner. About 5/6 years ago when my mother told me that my grandparents wanted to go away for Christmas, and therefore wouldn’t be here for the family celebrations… I cried.
This was change that I really wasn’t happy with. I’ve never been good with change- apparently. My mother says that it always takes me at least until October half-term for me to settle into a new school year. What with starting a new school, new lessons, new teachers and having to make new friends - this year, it will probably take me up until February half-term!
On Wednesday last week Mini turned 17. For a celebration we -Mini, Belle, Genie, myself and two other of our closest friends- met up in order to catch up and give Mini her birthday gifts from our lovely selves! As none of the girls has gone to the same sixth form as me I felt quite left out of the conversation, as I knew none of the people they were talking about and sharing stories over. Even so, I had a wonderful evening and would do it again in an instant! Especially because the whole night cost £5 (the wonders of Pizza hut vouchers and tap water!)
But it was as I was travelling home on the bus at 9pm, after being out ALL day (since 10am) did I have the time to reflect on the evening. I then had to stop myself bursting onto tears on the 52 as I realised that our lives weren’t the same any more, and they never would be again.
I think that what most frustrates me about this change is that I never really thought about it, although every adult I have mentioned it to has said to me ‘well, that was to be expected, really’. Why couldn’t they have warned me about this? Instead of me having to find this out on a bus? Why didn’t I see this happening? Why was I so na├»ve about our lives?
I have to stop asking rhetorical questions now because the main answer to all of them is, ‘I needed to find this out for myself’, that’s all I can think of right now. Being a person who believes that everything happens for a reason, there was a reason why my friends went to different schools than me and why we have followed different paths. What is this reason? Well, it’s yet to be found out.
Sakina Ahmed, a 17 year old girl in the year above me at my college, died on Tuesday 18th September. She was hit by a car the Friday before and after two major operations, the doctors were unable to help her anymore. She was a girl who I had never met, had never even heard of before I got sent an email from school telling us of the dreadful news. I may have passed her on my first 2 weeks around college but I’ll never know. She had just started her UCAS application and had so much of her life ahead of her. It seems like a life wasted. But last week I found an open Facebook page where many of her friends and family had left messages. Her friends talk about how lovely she was, and how the life she had lived was so full of love and happiness it definitely wasn’t a life wasted. This made me happy, but it also made me realise that life is short. Too short…
Okay, change - however big or small- is not great, we as humans are creatures of habit and when those habits break we are scared to find out what the new changes bring, because they may be better than the things we had to leave behind. This is a terrible thing to be scared of; surely experiences that could offer us new knowledge about life are the way we want to head? Learning is one of the most beautiful things in the world. If we keep to the same traditions throughout our lives, we are never going to break through our habits and we won’t learn new things.
If we never learn to accept change, we never accept to learn new things.
So don’t shy away from change, embrace it, push down your fears and you may learn things that you never even knew about yourself before. And remember life is short, so do whatever you can to be happy as that is simply the most important thing in life.
P.S. Just because our lives are really different now, this doesn’t mean my friends and I won’t be friends. I’m not going to rip out the pages of my address book just because they know different people to me. But I am going to make more of an effort to talk to them and ask them how their day went. If you really are friends then you will be able to stay together, no matter what life throws at you.
Written by Zee

No comments:

Post a Comment